Second Chances
by Otaku Kid1996
Summary: Title and summary have been changed. Warning for yaoi and spoilers. First couple of chapters are DN summed up from the POV of L and Light. What happens when L and Light are given a second chance together? Will they be able to do things right this time, or will Light's past sins come back to haunt him? Not the best with summaries, but please read and review anyway.
1. Chapter 1 L's Story

Disclaimer: I own nothing! I wish I did… well, spoiler alert for anyone who hasn't finished watching the show and some implied romance in the end. Enjoy! Please no flames. I do like constructive criticism, though.

Could you really have hoped to create a new world? Did you really think you were a god of some sort? Is that really how you saw everything? Under the short amount of time that we knew each other, I really hoped you weren't that kind of person. I think a part of me wanted you to be Kira, but another part of me just wanted to believe we were really friends. You were my only friend and for a while I started to trust you. But I guess I always knew that was too good to be true.

We met back at To-Oh University. Do you remember that day as clearly as I do? I only went there because I had to. I only went there because you were a suspect and I had to investigate further. Not once did I fear that I might actually get attached to you like I did. Not once did I expect to make a friend like you. In a way, I was sometimes envious of you. Normally, I can easily hide and lock away emotion.

But inside, I was jealous. I was always a little jealous.

You had everything you could have ever wanted. You had a "perfect life" that I could never even imagine having. You had real parents, two of them even. You had a sister who cared in her own strange ways. You had many friends that you could just blow everything off with. Every girl you met was immediately under your little spell. You didn't even have to try at all. Everyone loved you, everyone wanted to be someone like you. People looked up to you even. I was jealous because you got things without even having to ask and nobody doubted you. Except for me.

Remember when I confined you and Miss Amane? At first, you were so willing to just go with it. I knew it was an act. I knew it. But I had no evidence that proved otherwise. After a short amount of time, you seemed so innocent. I looked into your eyes… they were… Different… When we first met, they were dark and somewhat uncaring. But when I looked into them again, they were softer, rounder, and lighter. It was like you changed. I had already declared you as my only real friend before this, and I started to hope I was right.

I connected that the "power", that I now know as the Death Note, must have been passed on from you to someone else since shortly after this, the killings happened once again. In a way, I hoped that I was correct. I wanted you to continue like that, for us to win this together and stay friends. I never cared like this before, but I couldn't help it. I wanted my only friend to be innocent.

We were handcuffed together, because I still had my doubts. I had to survey you because I knew that I couldn't just be wrong like that. I was never wrong. I wanted you to be Kira in a way, so I could stop this right away. I was getting attached to you. I was getting too close and it honestly scared me. We fought shortly after the cuffs were added and I know it was my fault that it started. But I was depressed. I was confused. I wanted to be wrong just as much as I wanted to be right.

What was wrong with me?

I lost. I died in your arms, the last thing I saw being your face with those angry dark eyes, once again. You smiled down at me as if to say "I won". In the beginning, I said that I would find out who Kira was if it was the last thing I did. I guess in the end, it really was. I closed my eyes and accepted it. I knew I was going to die that day. Somehow, I knew. I died finding some peace in the fact that I was right and that I was able to find Kira's true identity. But that wasn't the end.

Then you lost. The victory belonged to one of my true successors. I stood over you as you took your final breaths. Did you see me? I thought I would be able to pass on now. I thought I'd finally rest in peace after your death. But all I felt was sadness. I still wished that I was wrong. I wished that we could have met under different circumstances and that you and I would have had a real chance at a real friendship. I stood over your body as I watched you slowly leave this world.

You were never a god. You were not justice. Even if they were "just criminals", you were just a murderer. Your branch of justice was misaligned all along. But I still wish that you didn't have to die.

I opened my eyes and looked around. What was that dream just now? Was it real? No, I would be dead if it were real. "Good morning," I heard your voice call out before being embraced by strong arms. I felt your breath on my neck and realized something… we finally got that second chance, Raito.


	2. Chapter 2 Light's Story

AN: Well a quick thanks to anyone who reviewed, favorited, and followed. This chapter is just basically Raito's POV on DN. its much longer than L's POV but if I didn't do that, they would pretty much be the same.

Disclaimer: Come on, I don't even own tha volumes of the freaking show. But if I did own Death Note, it may have ended differently... On with the story now!

I wanted to create a new world. I was a god. I was a savior. I knew the world needed a change. That was how I once saw it all.

Did you really doubt my motives that much? Did you know you could have stopped me? Were you really that confident? We knew each other for a short amount of time. But in that amount of time, I made a friend. But you were L and I was Kira. I wanted our friendship to be real at some point. But I had to make a better world and you were in the way. So it wasn't possible for us.

I remember meeting you at To-Oh University. I knew why you went there. I knew you never really cared about me, so why was I beginning to care about you? I had everything. But now I wanted something else. I wanted you to notice, to care.

You didn't care at all. You had no emotion at all. It pissed me off. I was a genius, I surpassed all. I was better than everyone. Everyone except for you. You were just as good as me. Maybe even better. You countered my every move and out-witted me more times than I'd like to admit. I had met my match. But for a while, it was fun. But I know you still didn't care.

I remember when you had to confine Misa. Then you confined me. I was willing to let you do it. It was just one big act all along. I knew that you were aware of that. But you couldn't prove it. I had the upper hand.

I'd thought it all through. After a while, I'd forgotten everything; the Death Note, the shinigami, all of it. But I still rememberred my feelings towards you. You were my best friend, and I cared about you...

All I could think of when we got out was that I knew I couldn't be Kira. I was ready to solve this case with you.

Then you added the handcuffs. It was strange to say the least. I knew you still doubted me, and it actually hurt a little... You said we were friends, so why couldn't you just believe me?

You said you were depressed. The way you made it sound... It's like you wanted me to be Kira. I was so angry. Okay, so maybe I shouldn't have punched you in the face. But you pissed me off. I trusted you! So why couldn't you trust me?! Did I even matter to you? Were you really that uncaring? I wanted to hate you, but I couldn't. More than anything I was just sad. But why?

Was there something wrong with me?

Then we caught the man at Yotsuba. It took us a while to catch him and Matsuda almost screwed everything up. But we caught him. We had the Death Note. And for a moment, I thought it was all over. I thought we finally finished this and that you and I could actually have a real friendship.

But then I had to remember everything. I regained ownership by killing that fool without you even knowing it. I was victorious. The handcuffs were removed.

All I had to do now was eliminate you and... And... Did I really want to kill you? Sure, you were in the way, but you were my best friend... I didn't want it to end that way.

But you were in the way... But I cared about you... But I'm the next God. Who needs friends when you're God?... But you were the only person in this world that I could ever really talk to and relate to... But I had to create a perfect world... But was it really a perfect world with you gone? Was it really worth losing you? What was this feeling all of a sudden? I was getting close to you. I had to distance myself. My emotions were getting in the way. I had to stay calm. I had to stay away from such feelings for the sake of the world. I'd have to kill you if that time ever came.

Then you lost. Rem killed you. I talked to you while we were out in the rain. You stood there and looked up at the grey sky. For a second, I thought you were insane. It was cold and wet out there. Then I went out into the rain so I could talk to you and realized that for the first time ever that I actually liked the rain...

You spoke of hearing bells that day. I was confused. Maybe you really were just insane... When we dried off inside, and you were rubbing my feet, I wondered why you were acting so strange that day. It was like you actually cared. I felt.. guilty... But why?

I reached down to dry your hair when I realized something. I couldn't kill you. I just couldn't. This feeling, whatever it was, told me that I could never live with myself ever again if I killed you. I cared about you, my only friend. I realized that this feeling... may actually be... love... But it was too late.

You died in my arms. For a moment, all I could think to do was smile victoriously down at you. I won. You were finally out of the way. I could finally create the perfect world that I envisioned. Then as you slowly closed your eyes I finally realized something.

You knew it all along, didn't you?

You warned Watari about deleting that data because you knew something might happen to him. That day, you knew you were going to die. And you did, knowing that it was all my fault...

I suddenly hated myself. I never got to apologize. I didn't realize that, in your own way, that's what you were doing- apologizing. I didn't even get to show that I was sorry. The last message you got from me was "I won." Damn it.

For a moment, I lost it. For a moment, I wasn't just acting. For a moment, I wanted you to just come back to me.

I called out for you to come back, but I knew you wouldn't. It was over for you. I decided that I couldn't afford to feel these things towards you anymore. I had to create my world. I had to be the God that the good, innocent, hard-working people expected me to be.

So that's what I did.

Then, I finally lost as well. It was all over. Takada died, Mikami killed himself, Misa was now an "ordinary girl". And I... Just died. Matsuda (can you believe it?) shot me quite a few times and Ryuuk finally wrote my name down.

I could have sworn you were right there, standing above me, looking down at me as I died. I wanted to say something. I wanted you to know that I was sorry. But nothing came out. Instead, I took my final breaths and closed my eyes as I felt my own heart stop.

I was supposed to be a God- a savior for all the hard-working and innocent people of the world. I was justice. They were bad people I was killing, after all. Was I wrong, all along?

I remembered my dad's words when we were talking after he went to the hospital from that heart attack. "It's not the the person who kills that is evil, but the power to do it that is trully evil." The words echoed in my mind.

"So, what you are saying, Mr. Yagami, is that the moment that Kira gained this... 'power', this ability, he was doomed from the very start?"

Were you both talking to me that day? Did you both know that I was Kira at that time? Is that why you both chose to say that? L, did you know that this was the fate that awaited me in the end? Or were you just as unsure as I was?

I opened my eyes and saw your sleeping form laying there in front of me. That wasn't a dream just now, I knew it. You look almost the same as did back then. The only difference is that you're now a little more tan and the bags under your eyes are now gone.

Is this what happened to those who used a Death Note? Was I given a second chance? You woke up shortly after me, sitting up and looking around. I realized that, this time, I had one more chance. I would do things right. I loved you L, Ryuzaki, Ryuuga. And I still do.

I sat up and wrapped my arms around you, saying "Good morning." I felt a strange pain in my shoulder blades and my hands. I decided that it was probably nothing and ignored it. Second chances make every difference, don't they?

AN:Well, what did you guys think? Was this bad? I had a harder time writing for Light than I did writing for L. ._.' But I hope you enjoyed this. The next chapter will continue after this and whatnot. This story actually has a plot now. Just don't expect super fast updates, because all I gotta work with here is a phone. Thanks for reading (I'm so babbling right now. Sorry.) Which POV was better, in your opinion? And no, the pain wasn't just "nothing". There is a real reason for that.

A quick thank you to D. M. (Sorry! my stupid phone wouldnt let me type the whole thing then hit save without the damn thing taking a chunk out of the name) for helping with the upcoming plot and with this chapter.


	3. Chapter 3 Shinigami

A/N: Okay, chapter 3 is finally here! I decided that they still have the same names as they did in their previous lives. Well, except Raito was Light and is now Raito and L is just Ryuzaki. I considered using L's real name, but decided against it in the end. This chapter has both L's and Raito's POV in it. Sorry if this chapter isn't that good but I had writer's block this week. But I still tried. Thank you to everyone who has read, reviewed, favorited, followed or even just commented. One person asked if Raito's pains had to do with the gunshots he recieved when he died. No, that wasn't it but it does have something to do with his past life. You all turn me into an excited fangirl when I see reviews, though. Well enough babbling, time to start the chapter.

Disclaimer: Yeah, I WISH I owned Death Note.

Raito's POV

During our "second chance" as you might call it, Ryuzaki and I have been living together ever since we both graduated high school. We knew each other since early childhood, and I immediately fell in love with him all over again. Although, this time, I'm more open about it. My parents accept me and I'm happy with him. I went to a university and became a high school teacher, of all things. Ryuzaki owns a small bakery where he makes all the food himself. Since we now live in a really small town, he's able to close it on weekends without too many complaints.

I'm 23 years old and he is 24 years old. Even now, he's still older than me. Can you believe it? I'm not too sure if he remembers our past together or not. I mean, I barely remembered this morning. And it's not like I'm gonna go out and say, "Hey, remember when I caused your death in our past lives, and we were both after each other to the point of where one of us had to die?" I mean, seriously. A part of me selfishly wishes he could remember but I know it's probably for the best if he doesn't. I don't want to ruin anything.

"Ryuzaki-kun, what do you want for breakfast?" I asked walking into the kitchen where Ryuzaki sat down and drank his coffee (with way too much sugar as usual).

"Hmmm.." he hummed, placing his thumb to his lips in thought, just like he used to. "I think I'll have some strawberry waffles."

"Right," I answered. I didn't realize how much his personality from before and now are basically the same. I guess I'm grateful that nothing's changed there.

After I finished making both of us a couple of strawberry waffles with syrup, I sit down on our small, round table across from him with my coffee.

As we both ate, it was dead silent. I started to feel a pain in both my hands and in my back, once again. And now, the pain was starting in my chest. This usually never happens. In fact, this was the first time I can recall this ever happening. I shrugged it off, anyways. It was probably all in my head.

Ryuzaki's POV

"So," Raito said, interrupting my thoughts. "How's your brother, Ryu-kun?"

"My... brother?" I felt confused. What was he talking about? And when did he start calling me "Ryu-kun"?

"Yeah, your brother. You know, Hitachi?"

A wave of realization hit me. I have a family, now. "Oh, Hitachi. He's doing well."

"Ryu-kun? Are you feeling okay?"

I nod quickly. It's as if remembering everything this morning made me momentarily forget about this life. I'm really no different than I used to be. Except, I sit "normally" now and I'm not as "clueless" about things as I used to be not having the "luxury" of being locked up in a dark room all day.

"Are you sure, Ryuzaki? You look like something might be bothering you. "

I masked my face so Raito couldn't tell what I was thinking and said, "I'm fine, Raito-kun. Please do not worry." And suddenly, I'm hiding my emotions all over again. I suppose old habits die hard. Lying to Raito like that made my chest hurt, and I felt guilty. But it is not like I could just tell him that I had a dream in which I died in his arms.

I immediately started to feel guilty. I hoped that he didn't have to remember that. Raito seemed to be acting normal..

"Light-kun," oh, wait!

Raito's POV

"Huh?" What the Hell? I haven't heard that name since L died. Did he maybe remember? What if he was angry with me? Did he call me "Light-kun" just to let me know that he rembered? Damn it, now I had to ask.

"Ryuzaki, why did you call me that? I'm Raito, remember?"

"Oh," he said, sounding bored. "Sorry. I am not sure why I called you that, Raito-kun. It must have been a mistake." Must have been?

I couldn't tell if he was lying or not. It could be his past life that was making say it without him realizing it. But, why now of all times? Why on the same day that I just happen to remember everything? Damn it, what's going on? I couldn't concentrate with all that damn pain shooting through my body.

"Raito-kun, are you okay? I'm sorry I called you the wrong name."

"It's fine, Ryuzaki," I said, pinching the bridge of my nose and closing my eyes. God, my head was hurting! "I think I just need to lie down for a while, okay?"

Ryuzaki nodded. He got up and helped me over to our bedroom where I just rested.

"Do you need anything, Raito-kun?"

"Y-yeah... Just go for now, okay? I just need some sleep. I want to be alone.""

Ryuzaki looked hurt but nodded and left the room without a word, closing the door behind him.

I must have been lying there for at least an hour and the pain was only increasing. I tried to fall asleep, but the pain in my skull only got worse, not even allowing me to doze off.

"So, I guess you finally remembered, huh? You know Light, I think you're really screwed, now. You would have been just fine if you went on in life unable to recall the past."

What the Hell? That voice was so familiar... And why was this person calling me Light instead of Raito? I was afraid to look and see who it was. A part of me already knew and just didn't want to confirm it. This was supposed to be my second chance! Things were supposed to go right, this time around! So why was this happening now?

"Hey, Light. Listen to me when I'm talking to you. No one's around, and I know you can hear me, human or not."

I opened my eyes and aure enough, to my horror, he was there. The shinigami that started it all. "R-Ryuk?"

"It's been a long time, Light," he said grinning and showing his crooked pointed teeth. "This should be fun."

"Ryuk, how is it that I can see you?"

A/N: Dun dun dun! Cliff hanger! Sorry, I was feeling evil today. Well what do you guys think will happen next? Any opinions so far? Did this suck or did you actually like it? If you had any questions about the story, feel free to leave a pm and I will answer you as soon as possible. Thanks for reading, guys. I'll try not to put so many cliff hangers in the future. Ja ne!


	4. Chapter 4 Deals

A/N: Well first off, one of the readers was concerned about Raito becoming Kira again. Don't worry about that. That's not the case. But, sorry, bad things _will _happen. I can almost completely promise a happy ending. I like happy endings, and usually hate my stories that come out with bad endings. So don't worry too much. Thank you everyone who has been supporting the story so far. I should have said this earlier on, but thank you to sakurablossom22 for making my first review a request for another chapter. Without it, I would have just kept it as a oneshot. And thank you D.M. once again for helping me as well. This is probably the longest chapter so far. Maybe it's all in my head? I don't know. It definately took more paper to write than the previous chapters.

Disclaimer: Okay, I can't even own the Ryuuk plushie that I've been eyeing every time I go into a Hastings. T^T one day, though! So yeah let's get on with the story. I don't think you guys bother to read this part, anyways.

Raito's POV

"R-Ryuuk? How is it that I can see you?"

"Hyuk, hey Light. 'How would you like to see life through a shinigami's eyes'?"

"W-what?"

What the Hell was he talking about? Surely, he wasn't referring to the shinigami eye deal. Ugh, why were my hands burning, now of all times?!

"Hyuk hyuk hyuk," God, how I hate that laugh of his already! "Hey Light, ever wonder what happens to a human who uses the Death Note once they die?"

...

I sat down at the kitchen table while Ryuuk was was eating what was left of my apples. Why did I have to buy so many? I didn't even like apples that much. Force of habit, maybe? I had asked Ryuzaki to go out and get me some pain killers so I could talk to Ryuuk without being heard. I checked my wrist watch. I still had a few minutes before Ryuzaki got home.

"So, Ryuuk," I started, "Let me get this straight... Since I wasn't allowed to go to Heaven or Hell, I was given two other options?"

"That's right," Ryuuk answered, with his mouth full.

"And... These two options are rebirth or the path of the shinigami?" Ryuuk nodded. "And since I remember everything about my past, I now have to become a shinigami myself?"

"That's right," he said grinning. "Only shinigami are allowed to remember their previous life. And since you will become a shinigami, Ryuzaki will forget all about Raito the human. And without the memory of the 'second chance' he asked for, as you called it, he will pass on. Just like he would have, had he not asked for it in the first place. He'll remember his past life. Just not this one."

I buried my face in my hands. I could feel myself trembling. I tried to control it, but it just would not stop. I could feel tears stinging my eyes. I didn't even bother to stop them. I had to lose Ryuzaki again. He wouldn't even remember this life that we shared together. Instead, he'd only remember how I caused his death. That would be his last memory of me. This was horrible.

"Hey, Light. What's wrong? I thought you hated L."

"He's not L anymore..."

"Still, didn't you hate him? I don't understand how humans can change their minds so easily about this sort of thing."

"Don't say that, Ryuuk. I never hated Ryuzaki. Not ever. Not even when he was L. He was... 'in the way', but I never hated him. And I never will."

My face was still buried in my hands. I was still crying.

"Ryuuk, isn't there.. Another way?"

It was silent. For a moment, I thought Ryuuk had left. Then I heard him take another bite from an apple and say, "Well, you could both die. I'd have to be the one to write your names in the Death Note, though. And there is no telling where you'd go after that. There usually aren't any third chances in the shinigami realm."

No. Ryuzaki was NOT going to die again because of me. I wouldn't allow that!

"Damn it, Ryuuk! Why did you have to come here now?! Why did you have to drop that stupid notebook in the first place!" I slammed my fists on the table.

"Well, as I said last time, I was bored. And I'm here because it's an obligation."

"Why?"

"Because it's a part of the deal between a shinigami who drops the notebook and the human who picks it up."

"Damn it, Ryuk!" All I was able to feel at that moment was anger and hatred towards the shinigami.

"Hyuk hyuk. You seem angry, Light. Well, what are you going to choose? You have to go with one."

"NO!" I practically screamed. I didn't care how ridiculous I may have looked. "Ryuzaki can't just 'pass on'! I can't just turn into a shinigami! And no way in Hell am I going to let him just DIE again! Ryuuk, this is MY second chance as well as it is Ryuzaki's! I won't let him go so easily! I love him, Ryuuk! I won't allow anything to happen to him this time! There has to be another way! PLEASE!"

"Hyuk hyuk hyuk. Dramatic as always, I see." He flashed another creepy grin at me.

I was breathing hard. The pain in my body was getting worse, but I didn't even care at the moment. I wanted to keep my life with Ryuzaki, no matter what it took.

"Well, those are the only choices I'm giving you, Light."

"Wh- well, what about Misa? Or Takada, or Mikami? What ever happened to them?"

"Hmmm, well Teru Mikami became a shinigami right after death. But the old man put a limit on how many people he is able to kill per year. It would cause 'conflict' and 'confusion' in the human world. That is something that we shinigami alone are not aloud to cause. The old man would never allow it. Which is why we never tell people their remaining life spans."

Ryuuk continued as he finished another apple. "Kiyomi Takada became a shinigami as well. But I suppose she was too 'scared' to go on with it. Two months after becoming a shinigami, she saved a human. She didn't wish to exist as a shinigami any longer. So she got what she wanted, I guess."

I always knew Takada wasn't very strong.

"And as for Misa Amane, she killed herself a year after your death. It was on the holiday that you humans call 'Valentines Day'. When she died, she never recalled possessing a Death Note or being a 'Kira'. And so the old man allowed her to have a second chance. She will never have to remember her past life, because she died, being able to forget it all and let go."

"And... So I, Light- Raito Yagami, have to become a shinigami for my 'past sins', then..."

"That's right. You're really screwed, Light. Hyuk hyuk hyuk."

I was about to bury my face in my hands again but stopped when I noticed something. My nails were much longer and sharper than before. Without thinking about it, I ran my tounge across my teeth to find that they'd done the same. I started to tremble once again.

"Ryuuk, I need you to stay here when I explain things to Ryuzaki... Can you do that?"

"Sure. Not like I'm eager to get back to the shinigami realm. The apples there are dry and disgusting." He grimaced. At least, I think he did. It was really hard to tell with shinigami.

...

Ryuzaki's POV

"Raito-kun, I'm home. I brought you some pain killers like you asked." I took my shoes off and headed towards the kitchen. I stopped when I heard more than one voice.

"Are you sure you want to tell him?" a familiar voice said.

"Yes. I'm sure that if what you said is true, then he already remembers," I heard Raito answer the other voice.

"Raito-kun?" I walked over into the kitchen and froze, dropping the bottle of pain killers I was holding. Right before me stood a shinigami.

"Hey, how's it goin'?" the shinigami asked, flashing a frightening grin at me, showing his many pointed teeth.

"Rai-Raito, what's going on?" I demanded, trying to sound as bored as possible.

"Have a seat, Ryuzaki. We need to talk..." he said, quietly. "I'm sure you remember Ryuuk. That's why you can see him."

...

"I refuse to accept that those are our only options, Ligh- uh Raito-kun." I said, deciding that I should just go back to calling him Light-kun. It felt right for some reason. "There has to be some other way."

"Those are our only options, Ryuzaki," Light-kun said sternly.

"No. Hey, shinigami," I called out to Ryuuk.

"Yes?" he grinned. God, that smile actually scared me a little. However, I still managed to make myself look and sound bored.

"There is something that you are not telling us. I am at least 85... No, 89% sure of that."

I hadn't used percentages like that in a while. Light-kun grinned. And I imagine it was because of the fact that I said that. But his grin quickly faded away.

"Hmm, you're right," the shinigami replied. "But I'm not obligated to tell you that."

"Tell us, or you cannot have any more apples. You can't go out and steal them without humans noticing, now can you?"

"WHAT?! Urgh, damn humans... Fine, but only because this is getting interesting. And also because I need more apples."

"Really? Then what is it that we can do?!" Light-kun chimed in.

"You have to make a deal with the old man." If I thought his grin was frightening before, that was nothing compared to how he looked, now.

"Old man?" I asked, placing my thumb to my lips, biting my nail in deep thought. "Are you referring to Death, himself?"

"That's right. Death. The king of the shinigami."

"And what 'deal' would we be making, exactly?"

"Hyuk hyuk, no clue. It depends on the old man. Would you like to meet him?"

I looked over to Light-kun with uncertainty. He nodded and said, "Well, it couldn't hurt to try..."

I nodded in agreement and added, "Ryuuk, take us to Death." I managed to sound like I didn't care. But honestly, I was worried. And a little scared.

I hoped we knew what we were doing here.

Raito's POV

I made myself a personal goal. To get Ryuzaki the life he deserved. Even if it didn't have me in it. Ryuuk told me that all the shinigami, except for "the old man", were once humans who used Death Notes. My second goal was to find out what Ryuuk's past was after helping Ryuzaki. Ryuuk better know what he was doing here.

A/N: Well, what do you think? Do you prefer longer or shorter chapters? How do you think it's going so far? Any predictions on what the "deal" will be? And who wants to hear Ryuuk's little backstory? Well, leave a comment or a PM if you have any questions. And congrats to My Mind Is Blank for correctly guessing why Raito was so ill.


	5. Chapter 5 Death and Mamoru

A/N: Okay! Thanks to everyone who has supported my story so far! Thank you to my mind is blank for adding this to your Death Note Afterlife community. I checked it out and found that LOVE the stories posted there. Well, sorry this chapter is way over due. I had it written I just havent had time to post. I'll be showing a glimpse of Ryuuk's backstory in here. Let me know what you think about it.

Disclaimer: I don't even own a friggin computer to type this fanfiction. Which is why my grammar and spelling may suck from time to time working with just a phone. Typing this takes MUCH longer. Owning Death Note would allow me to afford a real computer. End of story.

Jeez, disclaimers... Like the pledge of allegiance all over again... Well, here is the next chapter as promised! Over time, L may seem a little OOC but mostly because he is a little more "open" about things now. So sue me. He isn't antisocial anymore like before. Well, not AS antisocial. Ok, enough babbling. Enjoy!

Raito's POV

"Ryuuk, why have you brought... _Humans _here? You better have a good reason for opening up a portal for _humans_ _."_

The shinigami kept saying the word "humans" like it was acid. I'll admit, this Shinigami King was NOT at all what I expected yet at the same time, it was obvious who he was. I think. I always pictured the whole skeleton in a cloak with a scythe stereotype. He was still a skeleton, but it was like he was made out of gold. He had big jewels for eyes and was dressed like.. Well, a king. He sat at a throne big throne. I imagine that if he had actual eyes, he'd have rolled them by now.

"We need to see the old man," Ryuuk answered. Wait, what? This wasn't it?

"Ryuuk," Ryuzaki said as if speaking my mind, "does this mean that this shinigami is not him?"

"Nah, just Justin the 'jewel skeleton'." Ryuuk answered.

"My actual name is Armonia Justin Beyondormason," the shinigami spoke up. "But no, I am not the Death. If anything, I'm what you humans call his 'right hand man'. What do you need to see the Shinigami King for?"

"We-" I started.

"I was speaking to Ryuuk, human." This time the way he said human made me flinch.

"We need to make a certain deal with him. Come on, Justin. Just let us through. I'm getting impatient here."

Justin sighed. "What's in it for me?"

"Apples?" Ryuuk said, sounding rather unsure.

"It's gonna take more than that, Ryuuk."

"Oh come on, Justin. Please, Justin. Be a pal, JUSTIN."

Okay, so clearly just calling him Justin bothered him.

"Shut up, Ryuuk. You shall adress me by my full name. Don't act so familiar with me."

"Oh? But why not, Justin? Aren't we 'friends'? Please, JUSTIN?"

"Damn it, fine, you irritating brat!" Brat? How old were they, exactly? "Just leave me alone, already. And next time call me by my full name."

"How vain, hyuk hyuk hyuk."

Justin, clearly ignoring that last remark, stood up and made a strange hand gesture, causing a dark portal to open up in front of his throne. Ryuuk went through it with Ryuzaki and I following closely behind. When we got through, we were surrounded by nothing but black.

"Ryuuk," a voice called out. "What business do you have, bringing residents of the human world here?"

"Hey, Death," Ryuuk said casually as if he wasn't talking to... Death. "I got a couple of humans who wanna make a deal with you."

"Oh?"

Suddenly, out of the darkness came the scariest thing I'd ever seen. It was a large strange... Round mass... just suspended in the air with chains all around. In the middle of it was a big skull that was surrounded by a larger skull-like formation. The big one in the middle had to be that thing's head. There were four tentacles- each one having what looked like three fingers at the end of them, making hands that just hung from it. It was disgusting and frightening at the same time.

Was this Death? I wasn't sure if I wanted to scream, cry, vomit, or do a sick combination of all three.

"So, what can I help you with?" The words seemed to be coming from what I assumed was its head. I heard a thud on the ground to my right and looked to see that Ryuzaki had literally been brought to his knees. His eyes were wide and his mouth was wide open. I suddenly remembered L's reaction when he'd first heard the second Kira refer to shinigami on a tape. I could easily understand how frightened he must have been.

Deciding that I didn't want a repeat of what happened with the last shinigami, I spoke up. "A-are you speaking t-to Ryuuk or us?"

"You of coarse. Raito Asahi and Ryuzaki Rue... I understand, Mr. Asahi, that you were once the cause of much death and destruction in the human world in the past..." He didn't phrase it like a question, but I answered anyways.

"Y-yeah..." No way was I able to hide how terrified I was. How was I able to stand up to shinigami so easily in the past? "Not anymore of course," I added. "Well, you see... Mr. Death.. I-I- remember my past clearly. But I don't want to die just yet. I also don't want to transform into a shinigami. Is there another price we- I can pay.. For Ryuzaki and I to continue living as humans together?"

"Hn, I never did understand the emotion called 'love' all that much. But I can see that it plays a big role in all of this. Well, I could have you two give up your souls to me. Or you can collect other humans for me for the rest of your lives..."

"W-what? I- I can't..." If I did that, It'd be like playing "Kira" all over again. And I couldn't just give him Ryuzaki's soul.

"Psst, hey Light," Ryuuk muttered so that only Ryuzaki and I could hear him. "The old man is EASY to bribe. That's the trick here. Try offering up apples. See if he goes easy on ya."

Damn it, Ryuuk. Apples didn't solve everything! Why was Ryuuk even helping me in the first place? This wasn't like him at all... I decided to use his advice. Better than nothing, right?

"Hey, what if I brought you some apples?" I asked feeling more confident than I felt. "Since I come from the human world, I have easy access to them." I flashed a winning smile at him wondering if he was able to see it.

"Hmmm..." well, he seemed to at least be considering it! That was a start. I was getting desperate. "How many? I don't want to do this and then end up with only 3 apples or something."

I had to give him a decent amount. But not too many. Not only would it cost too much, I would sound just as desperate as I really was... "How about thirty?" I asked. Maybe that was too much?

"Hmm... Alright.." Yes! I was getting somewhere with this! "In exchange for thirty apples, I'll go easier on you."

"But I still have to do something else, right?"

"Yes, in exchange for one more chance, you must both become shinigami after this life is over. I cannot guarantee that you will recognize each other or have any memory of your pasts when that happens. But when two souls are connected as deeply as yours, their almost impossible to seperate for long.

"I expect a decision to be made as well as I expect my apples, in three days time. Until then, goodbye Raito Asahi and Ryuzaki Rue. Ryuuk, you are to stay in the human world with these two humans. By three days time, you are to bring them back here. That is all."

I realized that during all of this, Ryuzaki hadn't said a word.

Ryuzaki's POV

Being in the shinigami realm was a frightening experience. I've been able to to accept the existence of shinigami. That does not mean, however, that I was not terrified all the same. That is one thing I could never hide, no matter what... True fear.

There have been situations in which I was somewhat successful with that. And yet even in those situations, I'd still tremble sometimes..

We had already went back home by now. Light-kun and I must have been talking things over for hours. We decided that it would be best to take the offer. Light-kun was out getting apples while I sat in our bedroom on the bed with my legs folded up against my chest.

"Hey, somethin's bothering you," Ryuuk said to me, eating an apple. How had he not run out of them yet?

"Shinigami, is it true that Light-kun and I might stay 'connected'?"

"Well yeah, probably. You might not remember each other, but you will stay connected in some way. That much I know."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Well, I once knew a human... He was a Togu... His name was Mamoru. He wasn't very 'bright' and would crack jokes about almost everything. He fell in love with a woman named Mei..." his voice trailed off for a moment.

"Mamoru wanted to protect Mei. She was from China and at the time, Japan and China were at a war. She was taken prisoner during the war and held up in his palace. They were going to... kill her." He sounded like for the first time ever, he was feeling again. Like it'd been a while and he was just sad. Then, he snapped out of it and continued the story with a bored expression and tone.

"Well, this Mamoru guy, he was kind of a weak human, ya know? He finds the Death Note and uses it just to save her. Can you believe it? Well, in the end, she died anyways. And then Mamoru was executed for 'witchcraft' and murder. It turned out that Mei had, like you did, asked for a 'second chance' to be with her beloved Togu. But Mamoru never thought to ask."

"Well, they both became shinigami," he continued. "But, unfortunately for Mamoru, Mei did not remember him, nor did she recognize him. Even though the memories were gone, though, their bond remained forever. Over the years, Mamoru became cold and distant. He was no longer capable of the emotions or even the ability to care anymore. He was an uncaring shinigami who got easily bored and never gave a damn.

"Even as a shinigami, Mei was capable of feeling. She was more human than most shinigami and usually let her actions speak for her. She was always 'caring' and 'motherly' towards people she cared about. But, Mamoru wasn't even able to feel 'remorse' like he felt he was supposed to when Mei had died a second time. He brushed it off and moved on to something 'fun' to do. He makes no sense anymore, not even to me. I suppose he stopped caring, though, anyways."

"Ryuuk," I said, finally speaking up. "I'm only 20% sure about this, but were you Mamoru...? Is that how you know this story?"

"Hmm, yeah pretty much."

"Does it bother you at all?"

"Nah. I'm a shinigami, now. I could care less." I honestly couldn't tell if he meant it or not. "So, Ryuzaki, what's your deal?"

"Hn? Elaborate, Shinigami."

"Why are you suddenly 'in love' with Light? I don't get it. You guys were enemies before all this."

I placed my thumb to my mouth and chewed my thumb nail, thinking about how to answer that.

"I suppose... That, even though we were enemies, I never really hated Light-kun. I love him. Even in our past lives, I still loved him. I had that realization the moment that I declared him as my only true friend. I just didn't wish to admit it at the time. I was scared, then. But now, I realize that it's okay."

"So you loved him even when you knew he was Kira?"

I nodded."Yes. Which is precisely why I was scared. I loved him, regardless of what he did. Even though I was completely against it, I still felt that way towards him."

I never used the word "love" so many times in one conversation before. Not even to Light-kun. I felt a little vulnerable letting a shinigami know all this. But I couldn't help myself at the moment. L would have never been so open, or caring. L would not have been so scared ir worried. But I was no longer L. I was Ryuzaki. And I just had to accept that, because there was no way that I was going to forget that. I couldnt afford to.

A/N: Well, sorry I didn't update sooner! What did you think of Ryuuk's little story? For anyone who didn't know, a Togu is basically a Japanese word used for the next in line as an emperor. Basically hundreds of years ago, he was a prince. And if yiu haven't guessed (which you prabably have) Mei was Rem. I was exhausted when writing this, so it probably isn't that good. Oh well. Thank you guys for reading and reviewing and all that jazz! (Does anyone say that anymore...?) Next chapter, Light starts to change a little more. Since they didn't necessarily make the deal yet, he's still changing. Please review. Well you don't have to. I just like em. As long as I got readers, Im okay though. I'm babbling! You guys probably stopped reading by now. If not, yay(?).

Ja ne!


	6. Chapter 6 Fear

A/N: Okay, this chapter is sort of a filler, sorry. But I can't go on with the story without this. L can't just be as unemotional as before since he had a "normal" life this time around. Which means he has no reason to be afraid of showing how he feels here and there. He hides emotions, but he can't just bottle them up this time. So this chapter sort of adresses that. That being said, please enjoy anyways. Sorry if the OOC bothers you but I had to put this.

Disclaimer: If I owned Death Note, an emotional L wouldn't be considered way too ooc. Well, enjoy. Oh and once again thank you to everyone who has been supporting my story so far. You guys make it hard to have writers block sometimes.

Raito's POV

I went out and bought thirty apples and ended up getting ten more so Ryuuk wouldn't be tempted to eat the ones for this Tuesday. Okay, so you would think that since we lived in a small town and EVERYONE knew I was living with the owner of the only bakery in town, people wouldn't stare at me if I bought fourty apples.

Nope, they still stared at me. In fact, they stared at me like I was out buying adult novels and flaunting the covers. Jeez, no one stared when our neighbors down the street got excessive amounts of chocolate or cigarettes. But apples were weird? (Yeah, that little reference is probably what youre thinking.)

Come on!

I woke up the next day with a sore neck. I realized that I had fallen asleep on the couch. I usually slept with Ryuzaki, but I was afraid if hurting him. I looked down at my hands. Since we hadn't made the deal yet, I was still changing. My nails were much sharper now. I tried clipping them last night, but they just grew back. My fingers were longer and my hands were a little more scrawny looking. My teeth were getting really sharp now, too. I was scared that I might hurt Ryuzaki when holding him or kissing him, so I was really being careful.

I stood up and stretched a little until I heard my neck and back pop. Then, I headed for the bedroom. I expected to see Ryuzaki still asleep. But instead, he was sitting there with his knees folded up to his chest, his arms folded over his knees, and his face buried in his arms. Crap.

"Ryuzaki?" I asked, walking in slowly. He flinched a little, but he didn't move from his position. I sat down next to him on the bed. I wanted to hold him, but I was still afraid of harming him.

"Ryuzaki, what's wrong?"

"Light-kun..." he started to tremble. "I am worried..."

Ryuzaki was showing more emotion than he usually felt comfortable with. I started to get a little scared.

"Ryuzaki, I... I-"

"Why aren't you holding me like you usually do, Light-kun?"

"Wha..."

"Usually when I am feeling stressed or worried, you hold me and tell me that everything will be alright..." his voice cracked. "But... now, you're not doing those things... You are not trying to comfort me."

"Ryu-chan... I'm sorry, bu-"

"But? You cannot hold me now? Are you suddenly not capable of doing so? Do I suddenly disgust you or something?"

"Ryuzaki, are you oka-"

"No, as a matter of fact, I am not okay." He snapped and looked up at me. The sad look he gave me made my chest hurt. I could tell he got no sleep last night because the bags under his eyes were back. As I looked at his face, I realized that I could see the name "Ryuzaki Rue" above his head right above some jumbled up numbers.

I backed away from him and then realized that it was a mistake to do that.

"Light-kun...?" he looked so hurt.

"I'm sorry, Ryuzaki. Just talk to me. Tell me what's wrong."

"Where shall I start?" his eyes narrowed at me. "Well, just yesterday, I wake up to find out that I once died in your arms." I winced. He was pissed. "Then, RAITO," no -kun? Yep, really pissed off... "I find out that I have to become a shinigami some day. That scares me, alright? I will become a murderer... I do not wish to kill people! Then, as I'm scared, you won't even try to comfort me. You didn't even come in here last night to sleep. You slept on the damn couch, Raito!"

He never got even close to cursing before. I knew I messed up. I couldn't take it anymore. I grabbed Ryuzaki and pulled him closer to me. I hugged him and ran a hand through his still messy hair.

"Ryuzaki, I'm sorry... I know you don't want to kill... I'm sorry.. I don't want you to kill either. But we talked about this and and you said yourself that this was the only option you were going with. I'm sorry. This is all my fault for ever using that damned notebook in the first place..."

"Light-kun..." Ryuzaki hesitated. " Do you... want to use the Death Note again? Do you want to kill criminals again like before?"

I knew this question was coming.

"...Ryuzaki, I can't deny that I still hate criminals... And, to be honest, I still believe that this world would be better off without them... I will always want criminals to go away. But, I don't want to be the one who deals with them, anymore... The Death Note changed me, Ryuzaki. I slowly went insane. At first, all I wanted was to clean up the world... But after a while, I lost myself in the process.. I wanted more. I wanted to be 'God'. I don't want that anymore, Ryuzaki. Last time, you died because of that. I won't let that happen again. I ruined my chances to be happy with you once. That won't happen again, I promise."

"Light-kun... I love you..."

"I love you too, L..." I knew I should have called him Ryuzaki. But for that one moment, we weren't Raito Asahi and Ryuzaki Rue. For that one moment, we were Light Yagami and L. After thinking that, the name above his head changed. But only for an instant. I knew that the name I saw was his old name. I just knew.

"Light-kun... I'm scared.."

"I know. So am I. But everything will be okay. I'll make sure that we get through this thing together."

He leaned up towards me and pressed his lips to mine. They were warm and soft... I kissed him back, being gentle enough so that I wouldn't hurt him. Suddenly, I could taste tears. Was he crying? I pulled away and looked at Ryuzaki. He showed no signs of crying.

"Light-kun..." He reached up a hand and wiped fresh tears off my face. Then, he rested his head on my shoulder. "I'm tired."

"Get some sleep then... I'll stay with you, don't worry. Just relax."

Ryuzaki nodded and slowly fell asleep. I moved him so that he was lying down and sleeping soundly. I looked at him.. The name was still Ryuzaki Rue. But for one little moment, I saw it. The one name that I once worked so hard to get. The name that Rem wrote down. The name of the man who forever changed my fate.

L Lawliet.

A/N: Okay, so what did you think? Okay, it was kinda fluffy, but I can't just make a L and Light romance without fitting it somewhere in there. Oh and should my next fic after this be Mell and Matt or Mello and Near? Also, should that next story be lemon or rated T? Chances are, that story wont be up UNTIL I finish this one or have a day of writers block for and you guys have to wait or something. ( wn't happen though). So as always please leave a lovely little review. Well if you feel like it of coarse. Thank you to all my readers! My second fan fiction ever and you guys are so nice! :) I love the kind reviews you guys leave for me. They make it difficult to have writers block for long. So thank you all! XD

Ja ne!


	7. Chapter 7 Trapped

A/N: Okay, so I posted up a MelloxMatt lemon for anyone who's interested in reading. Check it out when you get the chance and let me know what you think. Thank you to everyone who has been supporting this story so far! You all make me very happy to know that you guys are still reading this and that this story doesn't just suck. You guys are all really kind in reviews and leave me a PM or a review with any comments questions or concerns about the story that you may have and I will get back to you as soon as possible. Seven chapters…. WOOOH! Oh and a quick warning because this chapter features Mello and so there is automatically going to be a bit of swearing. I think he only curses like once, though.

Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note the characters or anything else having to do with that. Just this story here. If I could though, I would own BB… yeah, I'm a freak. : ) Oh well.

Enjoy!

Raito's POV

I wonder why I was able to see Ryuzaki's old name. Was it because he's changing, too? Things were definitely getting weird. I wonder if Ryuuk knew anything about this…

Ryuzaki's POV

Everything looked amazing. We were outside and everything was decorated with white. There were seats to the left and to the right. The people to my left were my family. My mom Sakura, my father Eichi, my younger sister Sora, and many other family members of mine sat there. The people to the right were members of Raito's family. Who was that girl? Sayu… his sister. No, Raito had no siblings. So, who was she? How was it that I knew her?

There was a man in front with a little black book. To his right were my brother Hitachi and a few women. To his left were Raito-kun's closest friends. Then standing in the front facing the man was Raito. He was standing in front of an aisle, in fact… I gasped as I realized that this was my wedding day. I was finally marrying Raito Asahi.

I couldn't help but smile as a single tear rolled down my cheek. Was this really happening? I stood there in black suit. A man to my left grabbed my arm and walked me towards Raito. I looked into the audience to see that my father was still there. I looked up to the man at my left and gasped in shock as I uttered his name. A name that I hadn't used in so long…

"Watari…." Another tear escaped my eye. It was Watari… My-my true father. My dad, my care taker… the man who saved me and took me into his orphanage when I was only eight years old. Wait, no. That never happened. Eichi was my father, isn't he? Yes, that's right….. Watari looked down at me and winked, smiling. No, Watari was my care taker. And he… he was alive! Watari was alive. This means that he _didn't _die because of me. He was alive. I wanted to hug him, suddenly, but went against the urge to do so. He didn't look angry or disappointed in me. This had to be proof that he didn't die. He was alive all along. Wait, who on earth was Eichi again? And since when did I have a mother? What was going on?

I made my way over to Raito-kun, my heart beating fast and my palms starting to sweat. This was finally happening… We were finally going to spend the rest of our lives together…. I stood in front of him. He looked up at me, smiling warmly, his eyes full of warmth and love. I was finally going to be with Raito Asahi, my first and only love. The man with the book started talking but I wasn't really listening to the words.

Then I heard him say, "Do you take Light Yagami to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold…"

Wait a moment. I froze. Light Yagami? Did he just say Light Yagami? What on earth was I doing marrying Light Yagami? I never liked to admit to myself that I loved him, let alone anyone else I knew. And since when did I show this level of emotion? L could not afford to show such emotion ever.

I looked into the audience. Who were these people?! I suddenly couldn't recognize anyone with the exception of Sayu Yagami. Who was everyone else? I certainly do not recall having any family members. The last of them died in that fire when I was eight.

I looked at the people who were supposedly Light's family again. In the way back was the Kira investigation task force. They all looked very uneasy. Especially Soichiro Yagami. I recall him being a "homophobe" as some people called it. I do not believe that Soichiro was completely against homosexuals, nor do I believe that he "hates" them. However, he does posses very strong beliefs against them. So I understand, to some extent, his discomfort at seeing his only son marrying another man. He did bother to show up, so that means he did make an effort.

I then looked back at the side that was supposedly my family. In the way back were three young boys. They couldn't be older than 17 years old. I immediately recognized them as Mihael Keehl, also known as Mello, Mail Jeevas, also known as Matt, and Nate River, also known as Near. M, M, and N...

Near sat there observing us and twirling a lock of his white hair in between his thumb and forefinger. He looked skeptical to say the least. Matt was looking down at the floor, not really seeming to care about what was happening around him. He was leaning against Mello whose right arm was holding him closely by the waist while he was eating a chocolate bar. Mello was just glaring at Light.

"What the fuck, L?" he said, surprising the whole audience. "Why Kira? Don' t tell me you already lost."

"I... I..." I couldn't think of what I was supposed to say. What was going on? I thought that maybe the reason why I was marrying Light was because he wasn't Kira. Does this mean he is...?

I turned around to look at Light who said, "What's the matter, L?" His eyes were dark and cold, narrowed and red. He smiled, revealing sharp crooked teeth.

"Kira..." I muttered.

"That's right, L. I am Kira. You've lost. If only you were a little smarter. You really thought that you could defy God?" he laughed. It was hollow and cold. "Now die, already."

"Light-kun..." I felt Light's hands tighten around my neck. I couldn't breath. My throat and chest almost started to burn. I was terrified. Light-kun would never do something like this, right? No... Light Yagami would kill his own father if he felt that he had to... Light Yagami would kill L... No, wrong again. Only Kira would do that.

But Light Yagami was dead. And so was Kira.

So was Soichiro Yagami. Sayu Yagami was too traumatized to be able to be in perfect condition at her older brother's wedding like she was. Matt and Mello were already dead. Near was L. I no longer held that title. I had died. And that could only mean... That Watari really did die... It really happened and it was all my fault that he was gone. Thinking about it made my stomach clench.

Everything went black. The pressure around my neck was gone. I looked around and I was alone.

All alone.

With no family, no Watari, no Light-kun... I was all alone. And I was scared.

"But you're not alone," a voice rang in my head. "You have Raito-kun."

That's right. I have Raito-kun and he would never leave me or intentionally try to hurt me.

"But how can you be so sure?" another voice said. "He wanted you dead before. How's he any different now?" Maybe he had a point... "What if he became the same person once again?"

That thought scared me.

"Ryuzaki, don't listen to him!" I heard Light-kun's voice call out. "He's being stupid! Please believe me, I still love you!"

"Light-kun... I love you, too." I looked around. "Where are you?"

"I'm right here with you."

I suddenly felt him holding my hand. I looked to my right to see him smiling at me. I felt safe again. I had to remember that even in our past lives, Light-kun and Kira were two different people. And I loved Light, not Kira. And now, I love Raito. He's never going to hurt me like that ever again. Suddenly, he disappeared. I was alone again. It was so dark I could not even see my own hands. I was so cold. I was suffocating. And I was still alone... So alone...

"Wake up, Ryuzaki!" I heard Light-kun's voice, once again. No. It was Raito-kun. I had to remember that, now.

I sat up, panting and gasping for more air. I looked to my right and saw Raito sitting next to me and looking worried.

"Ryuzaki, are you okay?! You were practically yelling in your sleep."

I instantly wrapped my arms around his waist, holding him and burying my face in his chest. "Raito-kun..."

Raito's POV

"Ryuzaki, what's wrong? Did you have a nightmare?" Ryuzaki was trembling in my arms. "Ryuzaki, it's okay. I'm here for you."

"Raito-kun, I was all alone... I-I got... scared... I-I..." he wouldn't stop shaking. I could feel tears hit my t-shirt. I kissed his head and carefully rubbed his back saying, "It's going to be okay."

He nodded, not saying a word. Ryuuk floated into the room, now of all times.

"Ryuuk, if you want more apples, that's going to have to wai-"

"It's important." Ryuuk seemed so serious. He was never this serious. " Since I'm no longer just a shinigami haunting a human with a Death Note, there are no rules stopping me from helping you."

"What's going on?" I asked.

"You cannot make the deal on Tuesday."

Ryuzaki stiffened and sat up facing him, not bothering to wipe off any tears, and said, "What?"

"What the Hell?!" I said. "Why not, Ryuuk?!"

"Because once the transformation into a shinigami begins, the transformation is then completed within three days time."

A/N: Okay, another cliff hanger, sorry! So, I learned something after naming Ryuuk as a human... Shortly after posting that chapter in fact. I gave him the same name as Mamo-chan, Light Yagami's Japanese voice actor. Weird! O.o If anyone can find the true meaning behind the name Mamoru, please let me know what it is! Sorry for the cliff hanger! What did you think? Why do you think Death gave them that specific time limit, knowing that Light would be a shinigami by then? How did my description about L's thoughts about Watari come out? And do these questions in the author's notes bug? Hell, how many of you actually read these author's notes? Anyways, I hope you are enjoying the story so far. Thanks to everyone who has supported this story, so far! I will update the next chapter, as soon as possible.

Ja ne!


	8. Chapter 8 Changes

A/N: Okay, let me apologize for the late update. Its just school was coming to an end and so I was actually trying to get things done for once. But now, it's officially summer vacation here in (insert small town name here) and I am so freaking relieved! I wonder when schools in other places let out? I heard that some schools have vacation a whole month later... This true? Probably... Well anyways, I should have more time to write now, unless I actually end up with last minute plans. If that happens, I will be sure to let you know. Thank you for your patience. If I ever have to be late again, check out my other stories until I finally update so you wont be TOO dissapointed. Also, I realize that I have been spelling Ryuk's name wrong... sorry... But since I'm too lazy to go back and fix it, I'm just stickin' to Ryuuk, since no one's said anything, anyways. Well, enough of my babbling.

Disclaimer: Do I really have to put this for EVERY chapter? It's driving me insane... O.e I dont own anything! Enjoy!

Raito's POV

"Excuse me, Ryuuk?" that was all I could think to say at the moment.

"You heard me," Ryuk answered me. "The old man gave you that specific time limit, knowing what it would mean for you."

"B-but why?!" What reason could Death possibly have for doing this?

"Who knows? It's probably a trick. Death probably doesn't think you'll go through with it, so he sees no point in letting you choose. Besides, the old man prefers to do things when they just go his way. I don't think he's aware of the fact that I know how long the transformation takes. He wouldn't let me stay with you if he did."

"Can't we just go make the deal sooner?"

"I'm not supposed to bring you to the shinigami realm even a day earlier than Death has ordered. The agreement clearly stated 3 days. It's a pain in the neck really, but I can't just go breaking the rules ALL the time."

Ryuzaki finally spoke up. "Shinigami, there has to be something that we can do."

Ryuuk scratched the back of his head. "Actually, I'm not sure what to do myself."

"Damn it! Ryuuk, can't you go there yourself and find out what to do?" I said, trying but failing to stay calm.

"I gotta stay with you, though. 'When a human is currently going through a transformation, he/she has to have a shinigami with them at all times.' It's a rule."

"What the fuck, Ryuuk?!" Suddenly the pain I was feeling got even worse. Did I just growl?

"Raito-kun, please calm down..."

I didn't even bother to notice how scared Ryuzaki was at the moment. But I should have.

"Light, don't get so angry. You gotta calm down or you'll use too much energy at one time."

"So?! I don't want to calm down, Ryuuk." Why was I getting so angry? Was I always this dramatic?

"I know you're probably experiencing 'anger' right now, but you gotta stay calm, Light."

"Why should I?!" I practically yelled at him.

"If you use to much energy at one time during the trans..."

I couldn't hear the rest of Ryuuk's warning. I saw his mouth move, but no sound came out. It would seem his warning was a little too late. Pain shot through my shoulder blades once again. Only this time, it felt as if the skin on them was being pulled back further and further without tearing. I could hear the sound of fabric tearing, but I wasn't sure what it came from. Then my limbs started to hurt and I felt the same sensation as I did with my back. All I was able to do was scream, but I couldn't even hear myself. It was so painful.

Then, everything went black.

...

I looked around. Everything around me was still nothing but darkness. I couldn't move... All I felt was pain... What was going on?

Ryuzaki's POV

"I'm sorry, but I can't."

"Shinigami, just... Do it! At this rate, he practically IS a shinigami! That should be good enough.. It is not breaking the rules, merely bending them. I know you have done that before. Just... please help him!"

My voice actually cracked as I had said the last sentence. According to Ryuuk, the energy Raito had used and the stress he was going through had sped the process up a whole day. I felt so... useless... I could not do anything to help him at all.

Ryuuk just stared at me for a moment. Damn it, he wasn't going to do it, was he? I felt a dry lump un my throat. I looked down at Raito who was unconcious on the bed next to me. I was frightened when he had started to yell and now...

"This thing called 'love'..." Ryuuk started, interrupting my thoughts. I looked up at him as he continued, "... It makes humans so wreckless... Isn't it considered a weakness? Light once told me that he could not afford to love anyone as Kira, because it would weaken him. And... Every human I've encountered that gave in to such an emotion was ultimately weak."

He thought I was weak? Was that it? So, did he think that of that Miss Amane? And what of Matsuda who had clearly had a "thing" for Sayu Yagami? I felt so angry, now. I could not stop the tears that were rolling down my cheeks. Nor could I control how my body was racking with silent sobs that I refused to let out. I was crying... Out of anger, and sadness. Because I knew that I had to give up now. I knew that this wasn't something I alone could change. I was useless. I looked down at Raito's face.

He looked so tired, like the deep sleep he was in was doing nothing at all for him. I wonder if this is how I looked to him when he saw me dead...? His lips were slightly longer than before and slightly parted to reveal sharp, razor-like teeth. He had wings, now... They were similar to a bat's, spread out beneath him. His face was longer, his chin was a little more pointed, and his limbs and torso were also longer than before.

The man I loved was changing. I wanted to be able to to accept this, I had to. There was no changing what was happening to him. But I knew that once this change was over with, I'd never see him again. Perhaps I was selfish. But, can you trully blame me for wanting things to stay just the way they were? I was sad, confused, scared...

And I was angry. Especially at that damn shinigami. I love Raito, yet he was calling it a weakness? HE was calling ME weak? The shinigami that became what he is because he once fell in love with Rem? That's so... Wait.

'Well, this Mamoru guy, he was kind of a weak human, ya know?' I remembered Ryuuk saying this before... 'Mamoru wasn't even able to feel 'remorse' like he felt he was supposed to when Mei had died a second time...' 'He makes no sense anymore, not even to me...' 'Every human I've encountered...' He didn't even know that many humans...

Was Ryuuk...

"Shinigami," I said, trying not to let my voice crack. I looked up at him. He seemed surprised that I was responding. I looked him in the eyes, even though it did frighten me a little to do so, and said, "Mamoru was not weak."

I couldn't read his facial expression, what so ever. I wondered if I should have said more... No. Even if he was silent, I knew that I got through in one way or another. My words were enough. After a long moment if silence, he finally said, "You really love Light, don't you?" I nodded. "And this is more than just weakness?" I nodded again. "Fine, I'm goin'. I'll see if the old man can listen to reason."

Wings came out of Ryuuk's back and he flew off. What just happened? I decided not to question it. Instead, I lied down next to Raito, facing him. I placed a kiss on his cheek. I knew that deep inside, I hated what was happening to him. But I also knew that if it happened, there was nothing I could do to change it. There was one thing I saw when looking at him, though. He was... Beautiful. Perhaps I was stupid? I didn't care at the moment. Even though the man before me was changing, he was still beautiful.

Talking to Ryuuk made me realize something that I should have realized a long time ago. Especially in my past life. Love was not a weakness. It only makes you stronger. The weakness itself came from obsession. But I was not obsessed. I was in love. And that was all I needed to know.

Ryuuk's POV

Okay, so maybe I was an idiot. I'm not really sure myself. I knew I should have listened to Death and play his little games like he probably wanted me to. To be completely honest, I don't know what the Hell I'm doing anymore, or why I'm doin' it.

Light was fun. It's all been very interesting. And frankly, I guess I've finally had enough with the games I was playing. I knew what this choice was. It was as foolish and weak as the choices that Gelus and Rem had made... But, I felt like I had to do this. Light deserved this chance... More or less. After all, he was screwed because I was bored. I guess it was my time to repay him. Besides, I always wanted to know what happened to shinigami once they... Disappeared? Was that the right word?

I knew that we didn't turn into nothingness. I had talked to the old man about it before. It was as much a lie as it was to say that humans who used the Death Note turned into nothingness. So, maybe this way I'd find out what happened to Rem.

Rem... Mei... Did she even remember me? At all? When she became Rem, was she just pretending not to remember, or was it real? And, wherever or whoever the Hell she was now, did she remember me at all? Did she ever think about Ryuuk the shinigami, or Mamoru the human? Did she care?

Seeing the way that Light and L were together really reminded me of Mei and I. I don't understand the feelings I had back then. And honestly, I want to understand them again. I don't know who I am anymore. And I never thought about it enough to really care until I met L Lawliet and Light Yagami. They changed me. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing, but I guess I'd find out when this was all over.

"So, your mind is made up then, Ryuuk?" the old man asked. "No turning back?"

"Yeah. I'm growing bored of the shinigami lifestyle, anyways."

"All for two humans? How foolish."

"Hey, whatever, 'pops'. I just wanted to do one more thing before goin' out."

"But by doing this, Ryuuk you are indeed saving human lives. Are you sure you want to die like that?"

"Yeah, why not?" I answered. "I don't really care anymore, anyways. Just get on with it. Take me and the fifty apples I brought. That should be enough."

"You are a fool. But none the less, the deal has been made. Raito Asahi and Ryuzaki Rue can continue to live on as humans and will serve me after death. Goodbye, Ryuuk."

"Goodbye, Death."

...

I looked around me. Where the Hell was I? I stood up because apparently I was sitting wherever I was. The place I was at had grass meadows everwhere. There were trees all around. Not far from where I was standing, there was a pond. There was a sunset in the background, turning the sky a deep shade of red and purple.

I looked back at the trees. They were apple trees! All around! JACK POT! I ran over to the one closest to the pond and plucked maybe thirty apples off and set them down on the ground by the pond. I sat down and started to eat when I realized something.

My hands were different. They had human finger nails... Hell, they were human hands. I looked into the pond... I wasn't looking at myself. Or at the least, I wasn't looking at Ryuuk the shinigami. I saw brown eyes. Dark brown. And brunette hair... Then the skin tone was sort of pale. The nose was round and the face was kind of long with a clefted chin.

"Mamoru.." I heard myself saying. I waved at the reflection to make sure that it was indeed my reflection. I touched the water, seeing it ripple. What was I feeling all of a sudden? It seemed like "happiness". I wasn't too sure, but that had to be it. I saw someone elses reflection in the still rippling water. I could have sworn I was smiling.

The first thing that became clear in the reflection was blue eyes. Blue as the water I was looking into. Then, there was the jet black hair that went down past shoulders. It was a girl. She was... What was the word again? ... Beautiful... When the water was still again, I saw her standing right behind me looking into the water.

"Well, it's about time," she said. "I almost thought you forgot about me." She smiled. I turned around and saw her. My... I think it was my heart... It was beating faster... I could feel water leaking from my face. These were... Tears? I didn't think I was still capable of crying.

"So," she said. "Shall I call you Ryuuk, or Mamoru?" Her voice was now that of a young girl's. She had more emotion in her voice than I had heard from her in maybe hundreds if years. She no longer spoke with monotone. And then I understood why I stopped caring all those years ago. I didn't stop 'loving' Mei. I just never cared as much for Rem... It sounded bad, but they were still different. My face was really wet by now and I could taste salt.

I finally answered in a voice that I didn't recognize as Ryuuk's. "Mamoru... And... You?"

She extended her hand out to me and I accepted it as she helped me up. She smiled again and said, "Just call me Mei."

A/N: So what did you think? I was originally gonna just have Ryuuk die, but I am a HUGE sap and so I wanted to give him a happy ending. Originally, this chapter was gonna end with Ryuzaki's POV, but I decided to add a little extra as my way if saying sorry for being so late. Been a while since I updated this story and I'm getting a little rusty. Please review and let me know, with as much detail as possible, what parts you liked the most or even didn't like. As long as you're not rude about it, go ahead. Thanks for supporting the story so far! This story is almost coming to a close... *sniffle*

Ja ne!


	9. Chapter 9 Past Sins and New Beginnings

A/N: Okay, there is only one more chapter after this one. T-T writing this chapter made me really sad. In this chapter, there is going to be some talking about Sachiko and Misa in here and it's actually some what how I look at it. I used to hate Misa and now I can't... I tried to give the characters their happy endings in this story because I think they kinda deserved a better ending than what they got in the anime/manga. I love Death Note, Ohba, and Obata, but I wish it could have ended differently for some of the characters... Of course, that's what fan fiction is for. Thank all of you guys who follow, favorite, and review. You all make my day when I realize that my story isn't horrible. I especially want to thank those who leave guest reviews, because I can't ever personally thank you the way I want to. Thanks to my mind is blank for adding me to a community and to D.M. Bradley-Whittaker for giving helpful suggestions when I first decided to add to the story. Overall, thank all of you guys who've read even this far. Oh and for letting me know the meaning of Mamoru.

Disclaimer: Still don't own anything. Please enjoy.

Raito's POV

Seriously, where the Hell was I? I was able to move around now, but I was just walking around in darkness.

"You've 'lucked out', human," I heard a familiar voice say.

"Who's there?" I said, unable to see anyone but myself.

"It is me, Death. The king of all shinigami. Ryuuk the shinigami has made a 'sacrifice' just for you. Don't you feel all 'warm' inside?" The king was obviously mocking me.

"Sacrifice?"

"Yes... Ryuuk gave up his life as a shinigami to spare you and the other human."

Ryuuk did? How out of character... Was he crazy?! Why would he do that?

"What happens to shinigami that die?" I asked.

"I believe they go to the realm called Heaven. Most shinigami die because they went against me and decided to save a human life. I suppose the God of that realm is too forgiving..."

"Of that realm? How many Gods are there?"

"Ha, too many to count."

I never got to know Ryuuk's story... I guess it wasn't my business anyways.

"Would you like to know of the fate of those connected to Light Yagami, otherwise known as Kira?"

I nodded, although I wasn't too sure myself. I felt the ground around me shake and I fell on my ass from the force. The empty space in front of me seemed to split open and I saw a woman standing alone in a green meadow. The meadow was like something out of a movie with flowers all around and apple trees and sakura trees here and there. There was a sparkling pond that rippled slightly from the gentle breeze that was coming.

The woman had black hair that went down to the middle of her back and deep blue eyes. The last time I'd seen this woman, she seemed scared, alone, and unsure. Now, she was smiling brightly and humming.

"Naomi," a voice called out, making her stop her tune and turn around.

"Raye," she said, laughing. "There you are."

Raye Penber ran over to Naomi and the two of them were embracing each other. I felt a twinge of guilt for ruining what could have been a perfect marriage. And all for a "perfect world" that never came to be.

Naomi Misora and Raye Penber- two agents who loved each other and died doing what they felt was the right thing to do. They didn't deserve to have their names written down in a Death Note.

"Wait. Why is Raye in Heaven? He used the Death Note, didn't he?"

"Ah, true," the king answered. "But Raye Penber did not know what he was doing by writing those names down. And it was not exactly his choice to kill those people. He was given another chance. He didn't ask to be reborn and I really didn't want him in my realm. He would have made a pathetic shinigami."

The colors before me blurred and faded away as the scene before me changed. I saw the shinigami realm... The shinigami there appeared to be female, but I was only assuming at this point. Her eyes were like a snake's and so was her body. The only thing really setting her apart from a snake was the arms and clawed hands that stuck out of her sides. Her color was a slimey green. She looked disgusting.

She was mumbling something incoherent before writing something in a Death Note. Shortly after, she turned into a big pile of sand, ash, and bones. Suddenly, it was Takada in the same green meadow I had seen Naomi in. She was confused and lost. So she sat under a tree and just stayed there. She never moved. It seemed like seasons passed her by and time was going by and she just sat there lost and confused, unsure of what to do next.

I knew that if I hadn't become Kira, she'd know that she was in Heaven. She could have lived a happy life if Light Yagami- if Kira hadn't messed that up for her.

After a while, though, wings started to appear. They weren't black like shinigami wings. They were white with feathers. She started to slowly fade away. The look of confusion and sadness never left her face.

Was she an angel, is that it? Koyomi Takada, an intelligent woman who worked independently. A woman who was hard working and honest... Takada could have had a much brighter future if she had never met me. She could have done so much more with her life.

Everything was blurred and the scene changed once again. It was the shinigami realm again.. This shinigami had big, round, yellow eyes. He was black and white and looked like... Well, almost human. His body was sort of like Ryuuk's, but black and white square patches seemed to be stitched together on his body. His face looked like it was stitched together with two different pieces of white fabric. His face was still shaped like a human's and he had tattered black wings with ruffled and torn black feathers.

"Please, just let me write... Two more names, Armonia. P-please.." he begged the jewel skeleton.

"No, Taro," the jewel skeleton replied. "You have reached your limit for the year. You will get your Death Note back within 365 days, so just wait."

"B-but... There are bad people still out there! I have to delete them from existence. God failed in doing so and is now a normal human. God cannot do it anymore, so someone has to... I-I..."

Taro... He was Teru Mikami? He still called me God? He was planning on filling that roll for me? Was he that determined? Maybe he just went insane... Again, I felt guilty. He was a pathetic shinigami and it was all my fault. He could have gone to Heaven after death if I hadn't interfered.

Teru Mikami, a hard working, good and honest citizen. The kind of person I had worked so hard to create in the new world I had once envisioned. He was kind to the weak and had a strong sense if justice. Then I contacted him and caused him to sully his hands by killing with the Death Note.

The scene became something else. It was a blonde girl with big curious brown eyes. She was little, maybe around six years old. She was playing with a black kitten with green eyes with a string attached to a fake mouse. She sat in what seemed to be her backyard. It had a big tree with a tire swing. She sat on the grass with her legs folded underneath her. To be honest, I wasn't sure who she was but she did look familiar.

Then she started to sing a sad song and I knew who it was.

"Careful what you do... 'Cause God is watching your every move.

Hold my hand in the dark street. For if, you do, I know that I'll be safe.

Even if I'm far away and alone, I can be sure that you'll find me there..."

It was Misa.

"This I know.

You draw me close for a while, so quiet, you tell me everything. If I forget what you say, then you'll come to me, and tell me again. Yes, you'd tell me once again...

But what happens when... I know it all, then what shall I do after that? What then...?"

I felt, yet again, really guilty. I knew that this little girl did not remember Light Yagami or Kira. But I knew that even though this little girl was singing it, the song came from Misa Amane. I knew that the song was about me. She seemed so happy now.

A young boy accompanied by two adults came out into the backyard. The girl looked at them and smiled from ear to ear. They seemed to be her parents and an older brother.

"Mommy," she said. "I think Light deserves a treat!"

I felt a sinking feeling in my stomach. Oh God. She named the cat after me... Way to make me feel worse... Misa Amane, the girl who'd do anything for the man she loved. A girl that devoted her life to helping him even if she got nothing in return. She was a girl who was all alone in the world until she met the me. And yet, I treated her like she was nothing more than a tool. At first, I thought she was annoying a bother. But really, she was just a young girl who was lost and confused and more than willing to to listen to the first person thay made her feel safe and somewhat happy. I hoped that some day, she chose someone who was actually capable of loving her back this time. She at least deserved that much.

The scene changed and I saw my mother. She was old now and in a hospital bed. She looked like she was welcoming death. She looked so sad and lonely. I felt my own heart brake... Sachiko Yagami... Even after Kira was brought down, they allowed her to believe that her own son was innocent and just died when catching Kira.

Sachiko Yagami... She was one Hell of a mother. She was strong and loving and caring. She worried a lot about our family and always tried her best to keep herself together as well as trying to keep everything else under control if she could help it. And then I only took her for granted. Her husband died, her only son was a serial killer who was killed, her daughter... Her only daughter had to spend life in a wheel chair. My mother had to wheel her around and talk to her and help her recover. And now, she was all alone. Was that how she was going to die? Cold and sad... and alone?

I felt tears streak my face. I knew it was too late to apologize. I knew that this was an event that had already happened in the past. I knew that my mother was already dead. That made it even worse.

Then the door to her room opened up. It was Sayu in a wheel chair, being wheeled in by Matsuda. "Hey, Sachiko-san. How are you feeling? I brought Sayu in today. She's doing a lot better now with her speach and abilities."

My mother smiled at the two and answered, "Oh, I can't complain. I'm not in as much pain today. Thank you for bringing Sayu in."

"Oh, it's no problem," Matsuda said, smiling nervously.

"Hello, Sayu. How are you?"

Sayu opened her mouth as if to say something and then she closed her mouth. After a long moment, she said, "... okasan...? You are my... o-oka..san... Right..?" se seemed to have trouble finding the right words, and it took her a while to say each word, but she was talking.

"Yes, Sayu.. That is correct. I'm your mother."

"...Right... " Sayu replied. "Oh... I am... Doing... uhm... Good.. I am... Happy to see... you.."

"Good," my mother smiled at her, but I could see the pain in her eyes. "I love you, Sayu."

"I love... you too,... Okasan.." Sayu smiled at my mother. This... was all that was left of my family... My dying mother and my traumatized little sister. I did this. I was the older brother, I was supposed to protect her... Instead, I only caused her and my own mother so much pain.

"Touta-san," my mother said.

"Uh, yes, Sachiko-san?"

"Please, continue to take care of Sayu for me when I am gone... Thank you for all you have done..."

Matsuda looked like he wanted to deny it all. He looked like he wanted to tell her it would be okay and that she wasn't going to die. But instead, he looked down and said, "Yes, Sachiko.. Of course. I'll make sure that Sayu is okay..."

"Thank you..."

I knew that my mother wanted to die happy. Everyone does. I knew that she wanted to die smiling, and she wanted to believe that everything was okay. But she was still sad. She was suffering, and in so much pain.

I cried as I watched the slow beat on the heart monitor become one long and continuous beep. I couldn't turn away as she closed her eyes. Even though she welcomed death, this was not a movie. It was not a brave and noble death. It was the death of a mother who silenty suffered in life. She did not die smiling. She died with a sad frown on her face.

"Okasan!" I called out. I knew she couldn't here me, but I couldn't help it. All this time, I never thought of what she was going through even once. And now I hated myself for that. I wiped tears from my face as the scene changed again.

I saw dad sitting by a small pond. He looked down at the water, his face grief stricken and dissapointed.

"So, I take it that my son really was Kira... I was fooled... Well, at least I got to believe he was innocent before coming here... Oh Light... Why would you do such a thing? Did you really believe that you could have made a perfect world with childish methods?"

"Soichiro?"

I knew it was my mother's voice. My dad looked up and smiled before the scene changed once again.

It was Touta Matsuda. If I had to guess, I'd say he was in his mid forties. He was loosening up a black tie that was around his neck and taking his shoes off at his front door. He had a suitcase in hand that he just left by his shoes for the moment. He looked tired, but content.

"Jeez," he sighed. "The guys back at the task force sure were a handful, today... I can't believe Near gave up the position of L to someone else... Sayu, I'm home!"

Matsuda walked over to a dining room where I saw Sayu, probably in her thirties, sitting in a wooden chair.

"How was work?" she said, smiling. She was speaking a full sentence without hesitation. And she looked happy. She wasn't the traumatized and frightened Sayu that I once remembered. She must have recovered more after our mom died.

"Oh, it was alright," Matsuda answered as he kissed her on the cheek and sat down across from her. "I gotta say, being chief is more difficult than I thought. I don't know how your dad was able to handle it."

"He would have been proud of you, Touta-kun."

"Maybe... Oh, what do you want for dinner? I'm cooking tonight."

" Oh? What's the occasion?"

"Hmm... Nothing, really. I just feel like it," he laughed nervously.

"Touta-kun, you get a little too excited about cooking," she teased. Matsuda laughed nervously and blushed. So Matsuda really helped Sayu... I guess he really did love her. Although, the thought of it did bother me a little...

The scene changed again. It was... What the Hell? It was my neighbors from down the street. One of them was a blonde with blue eyes. He was sitting on a couch eating chocolate. Oh... Now I knew who it was. It was Mello, wasn't it? M...

Who was the red head playing video games, though? He gad big round glasses and light blue eyes. He sat on the floor playing what seemed to be a Final Fantasy game.

"Mail," the blonde said. "Look up from your damn game and give me some fucking attention for once."

The redhead chuckled and looked up at the blonde, saying, "Calm down, Mihael. I pay attention to you. It's just that Yuna here is close to dying."

Mihael kissed Mail's forehead. Then he scruntched up his nose and said, "Stop smoking already. It smells awful."

"You love the smell and you know it." Mail grinned.

"Whatever," the blonde snorted.

The scene changed again. It was Nate River. He was sitting in a quiet room, putting together a puzzle and twirling a lock of hair. A man came in and quietly watched the young albino.

"Gevanni..." he said, acknowledging the man.

"Hello Near."

"Gevanni, is something bothering you?" he asked, not bothering to look up from his puzzle.

"Are you sure you want to quit being L?"

"... yes... I am a man now, even though I do not look it. I don't to live the same way L did... And besides... It would seem that there are no more interesting cases to solve anymore... I found a suitable replacement at Wammy's. T is more than willing to become the next L."

"Right..."

"Gevanni... I am lonely..."

I was startled by the confession. Gevanni's reaction said he was just as surprised.

"Near...?"

"I believe that you are the only person who ever visits me anymore even if you do not have to, Gevanni. Everyone else was only there because they had to support me as N or L. Other than that, I am alone. Mello... he is dead... And even though he seemed to hate me at times, I still considered him a friend... and, I believe that you, too, are a very dear friend of mine. So please tell me, are you going to leave me behind any time soon?"

"O-of coarse not, Near!" Gevanni answered.

"Good..."

I know that Near claimed friendship in this little confession, but it seemed like it was so much more. Maybe I was imagining it. But the way he sounded when he spoke to Gevanni... I don't know, he had a strange yet sincere tone in his voice as he said it. I wasn't going to assume, though.

Nate River and Gevanni... Two people working together, even when Near was no longer going to be Near. Nate was all alone, now. And once again, it was my fault. It seemed like every scene here was made specifically to make me feel awful. And it was working.

The next scene was the same meadow as before, and this time it had Watari there. He was sad as he stood under a sakura tree, holding one of the blossoms in the palm of his right hand. The blossom was a late one. It was still closed while all the others were already opened.

"To think..." he said, "I met L Lawliet under a tree like this all those years ago when he was only eight years old..."

"Watari..." what was Ryuzaki doing there? It was only his voice. Watari looked around and seemed dissappointed when he didn't see Ryuzaki.

"...L..." he muttered.

"Watari..." the voice was faint, but Watari heard him loud and clear.

"Lawliet?"

"Watari... I'm sorry... We won, so please don't be angry."

"Won..?"

"Kira is... Light Yagami... is dead... So please forgive me.. It wasn't all for nothing."

"Ryuzaki, where are you? Of course I'm not angry."

"I am afraid, old friend, that you will not be able to see me... I have asked for a second chance... And it would seem that God, whoever or wherever he may be, has given me that chance. I know that I normally did not believe in such things, but it would seem that things change... I simply wanted to tell you goodbye properly."

Watari nodded sadly. The faint voice was now gone. Watari got on his knees and it looked as if he was praying silently. Then, he stood up and began to fade away.

The sakura blossom that was in his hand was now lying in the grass, opened.

The scene changed. It was now a hospital room. There was... What the Hell did Ryuzaki's dad have to do with this? He had jet black hair and silver eyes. I heard a baby's cry in the background. Eichi was handed the raven haired baby with big grey eyes.

"Eichi, what shall we name him?" Sakura's voice called out. I was only able to see Eichi and the baby boy. But since this was child birth, I was a little grateful for that.

"I am not sure..." he answered.

Eichi sat next to his wife who was now lying in a hospital bed, cradling the baby. A young boy came in. He had black hair that went down to his shoulders and big brown eyes. He seemed to be only seven years old. The boy walked over to his mother and looked at the baby.

"Is he my baby brother?" he asked.

"That is right, Hitachi," Sakura answered weakly. "He is your new baby brother."

"Cool... What's his name, daddy?"

Eichi looked down at the now sleeping baby. For a moment, it seemed like recognition flashed in his eyes, but only for a moment. Then he answered.

"Ryuzaki..." he said.

"Cool. Ryuzaki Rue..." Hitachi said.

Then I realized... Watari wanted one more chance. That was what he prayed for.

"It's like I said," Death said. "Once two or more souls are deeply connected, it is almost impossible to brake that connection."

The scene changed to Ryuzaki and I.

I looked like a monster. I was disgusting. But Ryuzaki was still there, holding me close and sleeping. He was still there even though I was changing into such a freak.

It changed one last time. There was a young man... I'll admit, he was handsome. He sat under an apple tree by a small pond, eating an apple and smiling while a young girl was asleep with her head on his lap. Who were they?

"This is Mamoru, a former togu, and Mei, the girl he foolishly tried to protect with the power of the Death Note." Death said. "They were once known as Ryuuk the shinigami and Rem the shinigami."

I had never seen Ryuuk so happy unless there were dozens of apples involved and even those times, it was never like this. So his name was Mamoru... His name meant "to protect"... It seemed fitting since that was apparently what he did in the past was protect... He was another human who's fate was changed by the Death Note. The colors all blurred and faded away until the scene was completely gone and the void there was once again nothing but black.

"As you can see, things turned out 'alright' for most of them. But, Light Yagami, do you think you deserve a life of happiness for all the pain you have caused?"

I thought for a long moment before answering. "No, I don't think so. Light Yagami, Kira, when I was those two people, I did nothing but hurt people. But I am no longer Light Yagami or Kira. I am Raito Asahi, and I've done nothing wrong in this life. Ryuuk gave up his life as a shinigami for me and I am not going to let that all go to waste."

"I guess that is all for now, then... Enjoy your last chance at human life, Raito Asahi."

...

I opened my eyes and saw Ryuzaki asleep in front of me, still holding me. I kissed him gently on the lips. I was finally going to give Ryuzaki the life he deserved. And the best part was that I could be a part of it. And I knew exactly what I was going to do.

He opened his eyes and gasped. "You're... Raito-kun, you are back to normal..."

I chuckled and kissed him again. He kissed back, holding me close as if he never wanted to let go. I wrapped my arms around him. His lips were warm and the kiss tasted like strawberries and vanilla.

Ryuzaki and I made love after that. I won't lie, it was pretty amazing. I loved how every moment of it felt. I loved Ryuzaki. And that wasn't gonna change any time soon.

As I lie there holding Ryuzaki close, he whispered, "I love you, Raito-kun..."

"I love you too, Ryuzaki." We kissed once again. "Hey, whatta 'ya say we leave and get the Hell out of Japan?"

He was silent for a moment. "... and go where, exactly?" he asked.

"Wherever you wanna go. England, France, America, Hell we ca even go to Russia if you want to." Ryuzaki chuckled at my answer. "What's so funny? I mean it, Ryuzaki."

Ryuzaki kissed my nose, making me blush before saying, "Sorry, Raito-kun. I will go wherever you take us." He held me even closer and buried his face in my bare chest.

"Ryuzaki..."

" It would seem that... We finally got that second chance, Raito."

A/N: Wooh! Next chapter is an epilogue! This is the longest chapter I have made for this story, I think. Then again, I'm looking at the word count including A/N's so... Yeah. Well, what did you think? Did like how I ended the chapter? :) It was basically the same quote from the end of the first chapter. It just seemed appropriate here. Thanks again for all you guys who support me and are so kind with feedback. Let me know what you thought about the other characters, their endings, and how I looked at it when writing about things thay went wrong and all that. I kinda cried when writing for Sachiko, probably because I'm a little sappy. Oh well. Thank you for reading!

Ja ne!


	10. Chapter 10 Epilogue

A/N: Okay, this is officially the last chapter of Second Chances. Not to worry, I already two other DN fics started, one is a BBxL fic while the other is a MelloxMatt fic so check em out if you feel like it. The last two chapters of Second Chances were both written on the same night, so chances are they're up on the same day. This is an epilogue. It has some implied NearxGevanni, so sorry if you don't ship that kind of pairing. But Near has to be happy with someone and Mello belongs to Matty. :P Thank you guys for supporting this story and reading it all the way through. Now I can click the little "complete" status box thingy for this story. I am kinda sad to see it end already, though. Im not putting a disclaimer, I already had one for the first 9 chapters, so yeah. Also, if there are any Kingdom Hearts fans out there reading this, I need ideas for a one shot (probably gonna be a romance :P) so if you got any suggestions for a KH oneshot, let me know!

Please enjoy!

Ryuzaki's POV

I woke up to the smell of fresh coffee and waffles. I got up and pulled on a pair of jeans before going into the kitchen. There waiting for me in front of the kitchen table was Raito-kun. Behind him on the table was a plate of strawberry waffles and coffee with lots of sugar just the way I like it. I smiled. He always did know how to wake me up.

I sat down at the seat where my food is waiting and Raito-kun immediately kisses me a few times. I still could not believe that this was happening sometimes. It has been two years since we moved here to New York. Raito-kun now teaches foreign languages at a college nearby. I currently do not work. However, once we have enough money, which will be soon, I am going to open up a new bakery here.

Raito proposed to me as soon as we moved in to our little apartment. I of course said yes. We told our families and they were more than accepting about our choice. I believe my older brother had said something along the lines of "Well, it's about time!" In a month, it will be our first year together as a married couple.

After everything that has happened, I can honestly say that I am glad Kira came into existence. I know that I shouldn't say that, since people lost their lives. But I never would have met Light-kun if he wasn't a suspect. I would have never married Raito-kun.

Once I was finished with breakfast, I accompanied Raito-kun on the couch in our living room. I sat in his lap as he held me with his hands on my waist. He nuzzled my neck and I chuckled.

"Raito-kun... stop... Not right now."

"And why not?" he replied, teasing me.

"I have to go help our new neighbors move in soon, Raito-kun. I do not have the time to be fooling around."

"You mean L #3 and Gevanni? They could move in on their own. You're only helping them move because you know them."

I made a face. "No, I mean Nate and Stephen. And I am helping them because they are our neighbors, Raito-kun."

"Whatever," he snorted. "Why did he have to quit being L, anyways? He was giving us weird looks when we welcomed them into the apartments and offered help."

"I trust Nate's judgement, someone decent shall succeed him. And he was probably looking at us weirdly because we look 'familiar'. Hn, now please stop kissing my neck so that I may dress properly. At least let me put a shirt on."

Raito-kun finally let go and so I went to our bedroom to put on a shirt.

Raito's POV

Everything was going perfectly, now. I guess I was right about Nea- Nate and Stephen. Ryuzaki and I finally had the lives we wanted. I couldn't imagine spending my life with anyone else. I am glad that I get to be a part of his life, now.

...

So, Ryuzaki, as you know that's our story. And I'm happy that we got to go through it all. I think it made our relationship even stronger. Sure, there were problems, but everything turned out okay. We've had some crazy times together, wouldn't you agree? I was actually afraid at some points where I thought that the struggles may be too great and you would have given up on me. But it all worked out and I have you now, as a result. I wouldn't change that for anything.

I didn't need to be God. I didn't need to change the world. I didn't need the power. All I needed was you. I loved you, L, Ryuzaki, Ryuuga, Lawliet. And I still do. Second chances make every difference, don't they?

The End. XD


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